Helicopter parenting is most likely the style you identify as your parenting. If you are in denial with its meaning, a helicopter parent is the one who spends an excessive amount of time in their child’s life. This includes your upgraded version the Lawnmower parent, which is calling you a household appliance that will chop from existence anything that inconveniences your child.
These are the two that get the most attention thanks to the impact your little darlings are starting to get noticed for. Since they are of the age where they are talking, walking and showing their personality.
You go through an elevated stage in life when you decide to partner up to create the next generation. You are no longer the most important thing to take care of and this is where much of what is you gets lost. This is your style of parenting and relationship-ing. We get it, you must mow down and be in control of each accept of your family and that is fine. The older they get to quicker you learn that letting them slowly be more self-efficient highlights how little you have left for yourself. The focus here is how to remember you. Lawnmowers and helicopters need attending to as much as the service they provide.
Social media forbid that you spend some time doing something without your kids before the Comment Box Mums will label you as a selfish parent. How can you be a present individual to your partner and children if you don’t know who that is? This is the thin line we are realising we need to talk about. You need to get a life to be a present parent and partner.
Spending some time by yourself is the first thing to regaining some of you. It is possible to make the space to do this in any schedule. It can start as small as 10 minutes. You pick somewhere in your day or week to create an uninterrupted 10 minutes to focus on you. Be imaginative with it. It does not have to exactly be a small thing that fits 10 minutes. The objective is to spend that time being you. Enough space to think of something you shoved aside. Where you do so does not matter, as long as those around you understand that for that length of time you are unavailable.
Gradually you can build it into hours then even days. Do not feel guilty to want to be in this state as it is normal to want to do something for you. This could mean you and your partner share this space where you both do your own thing but together. How much you do and speak to each other is up to you. Listen to your own needs and follow them. We spend a large amount of parenting teaching our kids to listen to their mind or heart. It is time to listen to your own.